FERT

As I mount this stage, all of you here will be thinking that a professor just arrived. No. Not like that. I am a hustler, I'm not a bookworm. It's from my university days that I realized that school doesn't bring in the money. The only person I could recollect that made money from school is my professor of psychology. He once got an international grant to research 'Why Corruption is endemic to Nigeria.' The project grant was to the sum of 20 million dollars, it's a United Nation sponsored project. My professor bought a brand new Range Rover, Married a Second wife, did the 40 years in remembrance of his late father. He was disbursing money like a happy yahoo boy. In no time, EFCC was after him. He'd diverted funds meant for research into personal use. School is not my thing. After all, ASUU strikes more than thunder! This book in my hand contains the list of comedy I'll be cracking for you all. If you like, laugh. And if you want, accuse me of not being a

Inside a commercial vehicle once, someone talked about how his younger brother - 37 years old died after a brief illness. He was unmarried without any child, yet possessed properties worthy of being a 'man.' After burying the dead, the family burnt all his possessions, ATM Cards inclusive, to totally erase his memories; since he left no child behind. 'That's the culture' he said. Thankfully, I'm not Yoruba. But out of curiosity, I asked; 'Which culture?' And everyone in the vehicle, regardless of the ethnicity or religion chorused; " African Culture" "It's the normal thing to do," said the drunk driving motorist. It broke my heart! Though the dead is gone, and the inanity of acquiring wealth ends once the heartbeat stops, I do not expect the living to treat the dead that way. But hey, this is life; perhaps meaningless! Different cultures with different ways of treating their dead. Many will bury their dead, some will burn, a few w

 As it stands, Daybreak is meaningless without the nightfall. Gold is just a stone without purification. We are humans, we are faced with ups and downs. May your intuition be strong enough to elevate you from your down moments. May your resilience for the hope of better days be more than your willingness to give up. Not for us, but for you; may you be a better version of you, daily. Shine bright, Stay strong, Laugh out. This is the Sound of Freedom, a sure sign of Victory. You're great, and getting there. Good morning.

 Humans of Lagos Profiling everywhere. In this city, you've got to exhibit some level of profiling to survive certain issues. The popular adage that if you're not wise in Lagos, you can't be wise anywhere is as true as the seawater is salty. Is profiling a good thing? No, I don't think so, but it's what it is. Many landlords/ladies won't give their apartments to single ladies. Most of them judge the ability of their prospective tenant's ability to be consistent in paying their house rents by their appearance, and religion. Damilola my atheist, unmarried friend needed an accommodation. Her landlady wanted to meet her pastor and her oversea based husband.  I generated a foreign number, and then called the poor woman acting as her tenant's husband. That was resolved.  I gave out one of my numbers as her pastor. Landlady called, I prayed for her and even prophesied to her. Days later, this landlady called me back to thank me for praying for her. I'm now

 The deceased Prophet TB Joshua contributed incredibly to Nigeria's religious tourism.  Nigerian Immigration Service once revealed that 6 out 10 foreigners visiting the country are SCOAN visitors. Zimbabwean Parliament cited him when discussing the Economic potentials of Religious Tourism. I was a carrier of the burden of a Peruvian woman who came to the country in search of 'supernatural' healing. At the height of TBJ's perceived persecution, he hinted at the prospect of relocating his ministry to Israel during a Sunday service. The statement proved controversial with several prominent Nigerians urging him to remain in the country, citing the economic setbacks Nigeria would likely experience through his potential relocation. Hospitality business in the Ikotun axis of Lagos state boomed 'cos of the presence of the synagogue. Prophet Temitope Balogun JOSHUA,  Thank you for;  Your positive economic impact on religious tourism, Those downtrodden you raised financially,

 All night, I dreamt about how glorious my Saturday partying would be.  Invitations to attend 2 parties, my day will be blessed, I prophesied.  I left the house not eating cos I knew I'd eat at the parties. The first party lived up to my expectations, I ate and I was happy.  Before I left the venue, I used their restroom. I signed out by doing a proper number 2.  Coming out of the room, a Server was passing by with a tray having glass cups of smoothies, I took a cup, drank it, and headed out Party 2 venue bound! I hopped into a rickety bus, with a rude conductor, and a useless driver.  Lagos people are not normal, except me.  I thought I could cope with their madness.  They frustrated me, and my frustration created a rumbling in my belly.  I became discomfited. The fuel in their bus stopped midway. These are never any responsible.  They dropped me off without getting to my destination.  I couldn't fight them; after all, I was wearing a white dress, and I was not ready to be sta