FERT

 It was a few days after the Lockdown. Michael Olúwafẹ́mi AJÍṢAFẸ́ was among the few people that didn't die of starvation induced by the Lockdown. If not for Garri, I don't know if I'd have been alive to this day. Garri became sweeter than the Jollof Rice then. When my sugar finished, I couldn't just do away with Garri still.  Ah, e no go better for the Lockdown! My friend in the USA sent me some dollars via RIA. I was so happy cos the Benjamin notes meant that I'll be rich in thousands of Naira. So I trekked from my residence at Ladi-Lak, Bariga to Diya street at Ifako Gbagada. Having borrowed some amount of money from a retailer in my street, I branched at Home Affairs Supermarket to buy groceries; I needed to flush out the Garri that I'd over-consumed.  After all, I'd collect Dollars that Ganiyu would help me convert to Naira. After my shopping, I majestically headed to First Bank to process my Dollars.  At the bank's entrance, the security personnel ...

 Prayer for the Bettors! (Image sourced from GettyImage) OH Lord, the seer of things to come, the revealer of the mysteries;  at your feet, we humbly bow. Let the blood of the, Chickens, Turkeys, Rams, and many more animals slaughtered for the New Year festivities atone for our sins. We cancel every red in our tickets. Shift away from us, our many years of pains, and give unto them, the bookies. Let the bookies be sad at our wins, let them wail from our winnings.  Let our sure odds not give us hypertension. And our over 2.5 not faint at the junction of over 1.5! That our Yes to GG never gets cut short. Anoint our heads to predict scores correctly, and your flaming fire we plead to destroy every machination of the VAR. Many are our afflictions. We've been labeled lazy by most of our friends and family members. How long will it take you, Oh Lord to rise in our defense? We have not stake beyond that which can hurt us if we lose. Let the seeds of our stakes blossom like veget...