And it went wrong

 All night, I dreamt about how glorious my Saturday partying would be. 

Invitations to attend 2 parties, my day will be blessed, I prophesied. 

I left the house not eating cos I knew I'd eat at the parties.

The first party lived up to my expectations, I ate and I was happy. 

Before I left the venue, I used their restroom. I signed out by doing a proper number 2. 

Coming out of the room, a Server was passing by with a tray having glass cups of smoothies, I took a cup, drank it, and headed out

Party 2 venue bound!

I hopped into a rickety bus, with a rude conductor, and a useless driver. 

Lagos people are not normal, except me. 

I thought I could cope with their madness. 

They frustrated me, and my frustration created a rumbling in my belly. 

I became discomfited.

The fuel in their bus stopped midway. These are never any responsible. 

They dropped me off without getting to my destination. 

I couldn't fight them; after all, I was wearing a white dress, and I was not ready to be stained by some miscreants. 

I'd to trek.

Now, my belly was heavier than my body.

My legs complained.

My anus wide opened, passed out Ammonia gas at intermittent.

It didn't cooperate with me.

I began to sweat like a defrost beer.

Though the venue was closer to me, my legs couldn't move any faster.

My belly was sounding in a thunderous harmony.

There was no Bush on the way to ease myself!

I wobble, like a cock pursuing a hen for copulation, I managed to arrive at the venue.

An Usher directed me to their restroom.

Dashing to the place, I encountered my crush.

She was all smiles.

I couldn't smile. Toilet was my goal.

Then in her tender voice, she said: "I love the perfume you're wearing, come give me a hug!"

And the devil ministered unto me; "Be a man! Hug her and then go to the toilet."

I heeded.

Hugging her, I released.

Smelly, slimy, watery pooh stained my trouser!

Ladies and gentlemen, I shit!

It was loud, massive, and volcanic.

Right in the embrace of my crush.

At that time, I'd wish that I disappeared!

©️ FERT, 2021